Beyond A Velvet Rage: Constructing Contemporary Gay Relationships


It is harder and harder for gay single men to enter into and maintain a long term intimate relationship despite the fact that research suggests that many gay men want to be in and value long-term intimate relationships. So then why is it so hard?

For years psychology and more modern versions of spirituality have offered their respective 2 cents on the subject deeming us either developmentally deficient or not working hard enough on our affirmations and vision boards. Much of this simply veils us from some of the current cultural realities that make intimate relationship formation and maintenance challenging in these modern times.

We will look at the dark forces that are really in play and to determine what each of us, if anything, we can do in order to fight them.

There is a false dichotomy when we separate the individual from culture. The individual and culture are in a dialog which co-construct each other. In this talk, I will be looking at both: first cultural influences that gay men are indoctrinated into and impact the individual. Together we will arrive at some conclusions as to what could be done in order to transform our community and ourselves.